Disclaimer: This article includes some spoilers for the series “Adolescence.”
Written by Ruth Gilbey
After watching “Adolescence” with my twin 14-year-old sons, I’ve found myself constantly reflecting. It sparked deep conversations in our household about teens and social media, and I’ve been eager to discuss it with anyone who will listen…
The Netflix series powerfully explores the complexities of smartphone use and the online world, how teens engage with digital platforms, and the real-life impact this can have on their mental health and well-being. It tackles uncomfortable yet essential topics head-on, such as toxic masculinity explained clearly and online subcultures like incels—an issue many parents haven’t fully understood until now.
Toxic masculinity refers to harmful expectations placed on young men, pressuring them to suppress emotions or behave aggressively, while incels are individuals who blame others, particularly women, for their own loneliness, often expressing anger online in harmful ways.
The show also references controversial figure Andrew Tate, known for promoting problematic views around masculinity, relationships, and wealth. His content often encourages aggressive, sexist, and harmful attitudes towards women, contributing to unhealthy mindsets among impressionable teens.
“Adolescence” was eye-opening precisely because it addressed these serious issues creatively yet realistically. Some moments genuinely shocked me, although, disappointingly, other scenes felt all too familiar. This sentiment is widely shared, with many viewers calling the series a wake-up call for parents, educators, and caregivers alike.
Without giving too many spoilers away, one episode is shot in a state secondary school. The response to this episode has been mixed—some parents were shocked by how the students responded, others felt it mirrored their own children’s experiences, while some felt it didn’t reflect their children’s schools at all.
It’s important to note the series isn’t intended to create fear or panic but rather encourage awareness, understanding, conversation and positive action. Small, unnoticed shifts in young people’s behaviour can accumulate over time, making it essential for us adults to remain present, attentive, and responsive to their emotional needs.
As parents, our instinct is always to protect our children. But it’s complicated—we often hand our kids smartphones, understandably wanting them to fit in and connect, yet we simultaneously expose them to significant risks. My twin boys were given smartphones from the age of 11. This is something both my sons (and we as parents) felt immense peer pressure to do. We were told they were the only ones in their class who didn’t have a phone, and that it was essential for homework, as many assignments are now shared online by teachers.
One valuable takeaway was a newfound appreciation for schools and teachers. Now, I understand the immense pressure educators face daily, striving to keep our children safe both offline and online.
Another striking aspect of the series is how it reveals the ripple effect on the entire family. Parents watching this will likely find themselves asking: “Have I done enough? AM I doing enough? Could I have done things differently?” These are uncomfortable but important questions. “Adolescence” shows us that behaviour doesn’t change in a vacuum—it’s shaped by dynamics at home, the quality of connection within the family, and the emotional availability of caregivers. The show doesn’t blame parents, but it does hold up a mirror. It encourages us to reflect, not to feel shame, but to grow.
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What age can children watch “Adolescence”?
Many parents have been asking about the appropriate viewing age. Netflix’s “Adolescence” has a UK age rating of 15 due to its themes of discrimination, language, and violence. This rating indicates that the series might not be suitable for children under 15. However, every child is different. You may want to watch it first yourself, then decide if your child can handle the content. We watched it with our 14-year-old twin sons and found it sparked healthy conversations, but I wouldn’t have felt comfortable doing so when they were younger than this. Ultimately, only you know your child best.
So, what can we, as parents, actually do now?
- Delay smartphone use: Consider waiting until your child is older, or better yet, have open discussions about why waiting might benefit their well-being.
- Age-appropriate content: Ensure your child uses platforms designed for their age. Encourage honesty about their age when signing up for social media, lying can expose them prematurely to inappropriate content and risk.
- Utilise family safety tools: Most platforms now offer robust family tools to manage screen time, restrict inappropriate content, and foster open conversations. Explore these features and talk about them openly with your children.
- Encourage open conversations: Regularly check in with your children about their online experiences. Create a safe space where they can discuss issues, worries, or encounters they’ve had online without fear of judgment or punishment.
- Prioritise family time and screen time management: In our household, despite juggling busy work schedules, we’ve found small steps like tech-free meals, phones down at 8pm, and watching programmes together have made a significant difference. Initially, my sons mentioned their friends joking about our family rules, yet they’ve also admitted they genuinely value the time spent together.
Looking for support?
If you’re wondering how to start these conversations at home, Media Smart offers a range of free, expert-backed resources to help young people understand advertising and the online world safely. From classroom materials for teachers to practical guides for parents and carers, Media Smart is here to empower 7–25 year-olds with the tools they need to think critically, act responsibly, and explore media-related careers.
Have you watched “Adolescence” yet?
At Media Smart, we’d genuinely love to hear your thoughts. What resonated most with you, and will it influence changes in your approach to technology with your teens? Let’s keep this vital conversation going.
